A Day to Remember

18 Dec 2011

One year! One year, can you believe it? As this year has passed I need to take some time and write what I feel. As I reflect on the experiences Kirsten and I have been through I truly can see that the Savior was trying to teach me valuable lessons. I sometimes wonder what and why we had to go through things and often found myself just staring and tearing up over a photo of Kirsten and I hanging on our wall. I want to take some time to express a deep love that I have for the Savior and share a deep gratitude for him giving me an opportunity to love Kirsten.

In March 2010 I was struggling, wondering if things were working out the way they were supposed to. I had been attending a Singles ward very actively; going to activities, making friends, and attending the temple with one of my best friends weekly. We would pick a different temple weekly if time would permit and do a session. I had been questioning hurt feelings of feeling alone and not having anyone there. I started to be able to trust people again and allow others to get close to me. I had been preparing for EFY and serving as my ward’s Sunday School President. Going back to these weekly temple nights, I remember sitting in the Celestial Room of the Mount Timpanogos Temple, looking toward the big window at the end of the room. I sat there across the way from a friend that was there with me. As I noticed him, he had taken an emblem out of his pocket that meant a lot to him and I noticed that he had started to cry. I remember that as I sat there wanting to help him though that hard time, thinking about the struggles he had gone though, this reminded me of all the things that I was going through; tears puddled in my eyes as the sweetest words that I needed to hear came to mind as if someone had whispered in my ear. After these words were written in the inner chambers of my heart, it was then when I gained a deep love for temple work and had a drive for being found in the temple. I knew that Heavenly eyes were looking out over me. These words to this day bring me the deepest peace one can feel in the midst of a chaotic world.


I left for EFY and had a wonderful time; little did I know at the beginning I would meet Kirsten and get to know her. The very last weeks of working with her I knew that Kirsten was exactly who I wanted to spend the rest of my mortal and eternal life with. She made me laugh and made me feel completely comfortable in my skin. I did not feel that I needed to always look my best; in fact, you can even ask Kirsten that one morning I was struggling to get out of bed and was running behind schedule, I may have walked out of my room without brushing my teeth. Yet she still talked to me and still even smiled doing it. My whole life I have struggled with self-confidence issues, mostly from constant abuse from peer influences. Kirsten started very early in our relationship to build me up. Though she didn’t know she was doing it, she helped me to start to see my self-worth. She believed in me while working to digest everything that I laid on the table and told her about. There were times that I was expecting her to say this is too much a walk away. She never did. She held my hand and walked with me though it all.

The week prior to EFY ending, I went home and surprised my mother, almost sending her into cardiac arrest walking up at 11:30 at night without her having any knowledge of me coming. As my week with her was coming to an end and I was headed to Ft Collins, I told her that I was kind of interested in someone but nothing has even happened or will be happening. Five days later I called to inform her that I would be getting married possibly within 6 to 12 months. My mother was a faucet turned on full blast. I went back to Utah and tried to resume life however I just could not get back to the normality of the way it was before.

Kirsten came back to Utah and as we dated I fell deeper and deeper in love with her. I started to meet her family and at times felt socially awkward around her Aunts, Uncles, Cousins and at times her parents. Yet they continue to be friendly and cordial with the socially awkward soon to be in-law. Kirsten and I took a trip to Colorado; she eagerly wanted to meet my mother and sisters. I believe that Kirsten has a way to adapt and accept any type of person and make them feel at peace. My mother instantly adored Kirsten; she, to this day, states that she is so grateful for Kirsten and that Kirsten is exactly that person that I needed in my life. Our engagement and courtship is definitely unique to others that you might hear about, however, the Lord speaks and we listen.


One year ago, this weekend, I woke up the morning of my wedding day, knowing that I would be married to my best friend and that she had accepted me for me. As we were married by Grandpa Mills in the Draper Temple I could not help but feel the presence of the Spirit teaching me that what was sealed that day on Earth was sealed in the books of heaven.

As we were married I took some time to look at the faces of those that were there. Most of them I had seen maybe once or twice but all gave me incredible strength. One face that I remember in detail is that of her father as he was handing over his parental responsibility to me, the look on his face as he taught me a valuable lesson. He taught me that love does not grow old; that the love that he has for Kirsten’s mother is deep and through my tears that day I saw who I wanted to become. He taught me that I am of worth and that he valued me, as he handed me one of his precious daughters. As Kirsten’s Grandfather exercised the Priesthood and sealed, I felt as if he opened the door to a rich heritage to the family that I wanted and needed—to have fathers that treated their wives with the deepest respect that a man can give. I realized that both these men are examples of what I can and will become.

So this weekend I have much to be grateful for. My experiences with Kirsten have been out of this world. A spontaneous road trip to Idaho to just get way, the smile that Kirsten has when I am acting like a dork, her patience with me as I get frustrated with my math homework, and that ability to make me tear up when she tells me that she loves me. So this year has had its ups and its downs but I truly have the deepest love for her and her family. I have truly been blessed this year with feeling of deep gratitude for family. I thank the Lord for his tender mercies as these past two years from that day in the temple and those words were spoken to me. Meeting Kirsten and falling madly deeply in love with her, knowing that trials will end and the most beautiful blessings will follow. I love you Kirsten, here is to spending the rest of my life and eternity with you.

Love Jason.